Only Connect

In E.M Forster's novel, Howard's End, there is the following quote: “Only connect! That was the whole of her sermon...Live in fragments no longer.” 

I love Forster's writing, but the essence of this quote keeps on coming back to me.  It seems to me that quite often we live in fragments, the various strands of our lives are kept separate and we allow ourselves to spend inordinate amounts of energy keeping secrets, hiding parts of our true selves and only living a half life.  Sometimes this is due to fear or an inability to be honest with ourselves.

The more we keep parts of our life in boxes, the less we can truly be ourselves and live the life we imagined.  Life isn't about burning bridges each time our lives are difficult, it isn't about cutting ties, cutting ourselves off from other people.  We need to make and keep connecting with people, especially when life is tough.

We often forget that life is actually a solo journey, and we must be happy alone before we can be happy with others.  We cannot rely on another person to make us happy, and we generally cannot blame them if we are miserable.  But that doesn't mean we should merely lean upon our own understanding.  Other people can put things into perspective, and allow us to live outside of our own heads.  Without that support we can blunder through life and lack the clarity to realise when we are heading the wrong way.

 If we don't talk, if we don't engage in life, then we don't learn from our mistakes and we don't grow as people.  Life has sadnesses and disappointments and isn't always particularly kind to us.  Sometimes we put our trust in people who aren't worth our trust and sometimes good people make a mess of things.  But we should always try to be kind.
We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
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